Emotional Triggers galore recently – sometimes to the point where I could use some emotional first aid! 🙂 And not just me; my family, colleagues and friends, too. Perhaps something in the air…?
Abraham Hicks says we feel more contrast and negative emotion the more aligned we become with our true nature. Great! I’m more aligned but totally feeling the contest. AND I don’t always remember to stay calm while the emotional trigger (the contrast) shows up. I’m getting better but sometimes I still beat up on myself for being triggered.
The good news is this is the perfect opportunity for me to use one of the things I teach: How to handle emotional triggers and stay more calm and peaceful in the moment.
You can get all 6 steps in the Emotional Trigger Emergency Kit right here. It walks you through how not to completely lose your shit when you are triggered. Of course, you still might lose it, but only until you remember that you have this Emotional First Aid to fall back on.
Why do I forget? Because emotional triggers, especially the big ones, cause an onslaught of negative emotion. It’s like Mt Vesuvius…
I’m driving (my car or shopping cart, for example) and some slow poke gets in front of me or a bunch of cattle…um…er…other shoppers block the aisle…you know, with their carts all across it and no one can get through. I just wanna get my shit done, get to where I’m going, and take care of some stuff! And then it happens…my volcano pops it’s top and off I go…boom!
In my mind I’m screaming and yelling – of course I wouldn’t do that out loud. I’m not a total crazy woman! The irritation and frustration bubble, bubble, toil and trouble.
And I don’t remember that I have an Emotional trigger First Aid Kit.
Like I said, I forget, too, sometimes. But as soon as I remember, I instantly implement the quick and simple process.
This tiny moment of delay in my day unleashes the bigger trigger: I feel safest when I’m organized and efficient and things are in flow. Ha! If I’m not getting my way I make up stories in my head about never having enough time, never getting anything done, and all around feeling rotten about my ability to get my to do’s done. None of this is true, of course!
My old habit is to immediately resist these bad-feeling emotions and reach for something that does feel good. But resisting what I’m feeling in that moment makes it feel worse!
In the habitual shrinking back from negative emotions it feels like thrashing about in a wave that has knocked you off your feet.
Thankfully my reason kicks in very quickly these days and I remember how to ride the wave instead of getting drowned by it. And I no longer beat the shit out of myself for reacting to a trigger instead of responding. I forgive myself quickly now.
The more I’ve practiced the steps in the Emergency Kit the easier it is to remain patient and calm. I go for weeks without erupting. I’m so much better than I used to be. So much more aware and present now. It’s fabulous.
The number one step in the Emergency Kit is to notice the emotion you’re experiencing and to name it as accurately and truthfully as possible.
It doesn’t matter if you call it frustration, sadness, mild discomfort or paint-peeling-fucking-rage. The label has to be your truth and exactly what you’re feeling.
Naming the emotion allows you to be more objective about it so that you can begin to dissolve it rather than be stuck at the mercy of riding it out. It’s like taming the wild horse you’ve just jumped on rather than being bucked off of it.
You can get the rest of the 6 steps here. Once you know them they take about a minute to implement. And when you use them regularly they become second nature and the emotional triggers don’t stand a chance! And you remain more calm and peaceful and present more often. Phew!