When I first had children I had all these ideas about what type of mom I was going to be. Many of them involved some sort of “super momishness” and made me feel like I had painted myself into a corner. I had my own expectations, learned expectations, and perceived expectations of what I thought a mom should be and do.
As I’ve journeyed into my own heart and opened myself up to new perspectives since my kids have been here, I’ve realized that I am far from a traditional mom – whatever that is, I’m not one of those. It took me a while to fully define what type of mom I want to be. Mom is an evolving definition. I prefer the word Mommy. It sounds so beautiful when my kids say it.
I see myself as more of a guide and collaborator with my kids. I love that they chose me to bring them into this world and that I get to experience what it’s like to live with these amazing, creative, rambunctious, irrational, wise little people. I love that they call me Mommy and that I get to hug them and squeeze them all I want. But I no longer see myself as someone who has to set rules and boundaries, enforce them, teach social conventions and conformity, tell them what to do, or ensure that they are happy and entertained.
My kids are happy, know how to be, know how to find information, and we are all learning how to trust our emotional guidance system and be in tune with our hearts. My kids don’t go to school and so they are not exposed to the traditional social indoctrination that happens. They know boundaries and treat each other and others with kindness. They also face the consequences of their choices. They are figuring out their passions and learning what excites them. Of course I do my best to lead by example and we have many, many conversations about living life. I am consistently practicing raising my own vibration and holding my kids in their highest wellbeing and love. I am also practicing expecting the best for their life instead of worrying about whether or not they will be ok as they grow.
I have no idea what their life or the world will be like when they are grown up. Our world is different than our parent’s world and not much that I learned as a youngster prepared me for life. I didn’t know how to trust myself, how to follow my bliss, or how to live from the heart. I knew how to worry, listen to authority, and get a job. And I had amazing parents and many role models. I think our children are going to be so much smarter and more aligned with their reason for being alive because they already are and I am creating an environment for them to be even more grounded in themselves.
A new type of mom was born when I had my children and it has taken me a number of years to fully realize her. I love this new type of mom!